• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer

George Richardson

Palo Alto Divorce Attorney & Mediator

Call Us Today
650-250-0204
650-250-0204
  • About George
  • Family Law
    • A Team Approach
    • Family Law / Divorce: How to Proceed
    • Premarital and Post Marital Agreements
    • Consulting Counsel
    • Cooperative Agreements
  • Collaborative Divorce
    • Collaborative Divorce
    • A Team Approach
  • Mediation
    • Mediation: Advocate for Yourself
    • Mediation Explained
  • Blog
  • Contact Us
You are here: Home / Blog / Child Custody and Child Support in a Collaborative Divorce

Child Custody and Child Support in a Collaborative Divorce

October 27, 2020 By George Richardson

How do child custody and child support work differently in a Collaborative Divorce than a litigated divorce?

You will rarely hear the word “custody” pass my lips. Custody is a trigger word that suggests exclusive ownership. You don’t own your children. They are children, not cattle. They deserve the love and respect of both parents, even when those parents are barely talking with each other.

Rather than “custody,” think about “parenting” or “co-parenting” for the sake of your children.

Even when communications are not working well between you, as parents, you can work in parallel, with the same goals of safety and love for your children. Think about the time that each of you will be able to spend with the children. In Collaborative Divorce, we discuss which parent is responsible for what and when. We don’t ask someone to impose a time schedule on the parents, we work with the parents to design their own timesharing schedule.

There may be situations that dictate the timeshare needs to be something other than simply an equal time share. Children generally prosper if they have equal or close to equal time with each parent. However, that’s not always possible. The demands of one parent’s work schedule may require more flexibility. If there are concerns about substance abuse or mental stability, the children’s safety is paramount. Even then, with professional support, the children can be safe and able to spend time with both parents.

We talk about responsibilities that you have as a parent.

We talk about responsibilities that the other parent has as a parent. We are talking about nurturing your children so that they can grow up and have successful relationships. The more that you and have increased hostility and conflict, the more you reduce the chances of your children being able to have solid, long term relationships.

The difference between a Collaborative Divorce and a litigated is drastic. A litigated divorce in court, is a very messy process that has great potential for damaging your children.

In a Collaborative Divorce or mediation, I like to work with a mental health professional to assist in the design of a parenting plan. This assures that both voices are heard as the plan is created.

In a Collaborative Divorce, the parents work with a child specialist as part of the team.

Whether the children are 2 years old or 52 years old, your divorce has an impact on them. It is often really helpful for your children to have their voices heard in the divorce: not to make decisions for you but to have their concerns heard. A child specialist, or an adult child specialist, assists by talking to your kids, and gathering information from them. That information is brought back to you and the other parent in order to design a parenting plan that fits your family more successfully than an order imposed by a court or court mediator.

Filed Under: Blog

Primary Sidebar

Law & Mediation Office of  George B. Richardson
Meeting by appointment only

Contact Us 650-250-0204

"*" indicates required fields

Name*

From the Blog

Communication during divorce

Communication Do’s and Don’ts During the Divorce Process

As Captain said to Cool Hand Luke, “What we’ve got here is failure to communicate.” Indeed, one of the most common denominators for people going through the divorce process is just that. There are … [Read More...]

Footer

George B. Richardson

Law & Mediation Office of George B. Richardson
Meeting by appointment only
Mailing Address:
2225 East Bayshore Road, Suite 200
Palo Alto, CA 94303-3220
Office: 650-250-0204
email George Richardson

Do Not Use Footer 2

  • Facebook
  • LinkedIn
California Divorce Attorneys, Mental Health Professionals, Financial Planners
Superb Rated AttorneyBoard Certified by the California Board of Legal Specialization
AV rated by Martindale Hubbell

Copyright © 2023 - All Rights Reserved

· · ·

Web Design by The Crouch Group · Log in

  • About George
  • Family Law
    ▼
    • A Team Approach
    • Family Law / Divorce: How to Proceed
    • Premarital and Post Marital Agreements
    • Consulting Counsel
    • Cooperative Agreements
  • Collaborative Divorce
    ▼
    • Collaborative Divorce
    • A Team Approach
  • Mediation
    ▼
    • Mediation: Advocate for Yourself
    • Mediation Explained
  • Blog
  • Contact Us